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What to know before clicking ‘I agree’ on terms of service agreement or privacy policy

By - Feb 05,2020 - Last updated at Feb 05,2020

AFP photo

We’ve all done it. We’re updating the operating system on our mobile phone or installing an app, and we lazily skim through the privacy policy or we don’t bother to read it at all before blindly clicking “I agree”.

Never mind that we are handing out our sensitive personal information to anyone who asks. A Deloitte survey of 2,000 US consumers in 2017 found that 91 per cent of people consent to terms of service without reading them. For younger people, ages 18-34, that rate was even higher: 97 per cent did so.

ProPrivacy.com says the figure is even higher. The digital privacy group recently asked Internet users to take a survey as part of a market research study for a $1 reward. The survey asked participants to agree to the terms and conditions, then tracked how many users clicked through to read them.

Those who clicked through were met with a lengthy user agreement. Buried in that agreement were mischievous clauses such as one that gives your mom permission to review your internet browsing history and another that hands over naming rights to your firstborn child.

Out of 100 people, 19 clicked through to the terms and conditions page, but only one person read it thoroughly enough to realise they’d be agreeing to grant drones access to the airspace over their home.

This isn’t the first time researchers have used trickery to drive the point home that few people read all the terms of service, privacy policies and other agreements that regularly pop up on their screens.

In 2016, two communication professors — Jonathan Obar of York University in Toronto and Anne Oeldorf-Hirsch of the University of Connecticut — asked unsuspecting college students to join nonexistent social network NameDrop and agree to the terms of service. Those who did unwittingly gave NameDrop their firstborn children and agreed to have anything they shared on the service passed on to the National Security Agency.

Some companies reward customers who scour the small print. Last year, Georgia high school teacher Donelan Andrews won $10,000 for poring through the terms of the travel insurance policy she purchased for a trip to England. The Florida insurer, Squaremouth, offered the prize to the first person who e-mailed the company.

Other companies ding consumers to draw attention to the risks. In 2017, 22,000 people signing up for free public Wi-Fi agreed to perform 1,000 hours of community service — cleaning toilets, scraping gum off the sidewalk and “relieving sewer blockages” — to highlight “the lack of consumer awareness of what they are signing up to when they access free WiFi”. The company, Purple, offered a prize for anyone who read the terms and conditions and found the clause. One person claimed it.

 

What you don’t 

know can hurt you

 

The problem? We needlessly put ourselves at risk by signing away all kinds of rights over what personal data an app or website collects, how they use it, with whom they share it and how long they keep it, says ProPrivacy.com, which decided to draw attention to the problem on Tuesday when the world observes Data Privacy Day.

Shady individuals and outfits and snooping corporations constantly extract and exploit our personal information for financial gain, spying on us with the kind of sophisticated monitoring tools that would make James Bond drool.

It’s not just ad targeting. Some of that information can end up in the hands of health insurers, life insurance companies, even employers, all of which make critical decisions about our lives.

Yet, we mostly just shrug our shoulders when asked. At first, more than two-thirds of the ProPrivacy.com survey participants claimed they read the agreement and 33 claimed to have read it top to bottom. When the jig was up, they offered up the same old excuses: It took too much time to read through it all. They trusted the organisation had their best interests at heart. Or they simply didn’t care.

That “que será será” attitude is understandable. There are few laws or regulations protecting online privacy, so shielding our personal information from prying eyes can seem like an exercise in futility. But we can all take steps to thwart 24/7 corporate surveillance. That starts with reading the small print.

 

What are you signing?

 

The terms of service is a legal document that protects the company and explains to consumers what the rules are when using the service, says Ray Walsh, data privacy advocate at ProPrivacy.com. A privacy policy, on the other hand, is a legal document that explains to users how their data will be collected and used by the company and any third parties or affiliates. Remember, when you click “I agree” on these documents, your approval is legally binding.

Much of what’s included in these documents is boilerplate or relatively innocuous. But there are some areas to pay attention to, such as granting a company the right to sell your personal information to third parties, trace your movements using GPS and other tracking capabilities, harvest your device identifiers or track your device’s IP address and other digital identifiers, Walsh says. Beware of companies that demand a “perpetual licence” to your “likeness” or to your personal data.

“These kinds of invasive stipulations can be extremely harmful, and consumers must ensure that they never agree to them or other privacy agreements that denote not how the user will gain privacy but rather how they will have it stripped from them,” Walsh says.

 

Search for keywords

 

Who has the time to wade through page after page of dense legal jargon to spot the worrisome bits?

Alex Hern, a journalist with The Guardian, spent one week in 2015 reading the terms and conditions the rest of us don’t. The result: It took him eight hours to skim 146,000 words in 33 documents. A study by two law professors in 2019 found that 99 per cent of the 500 most popular US websites had terms of service written as complexly as academic journals, making them inaccessible to most people.

If your eyes are glazing over, there are some shortcuts. Search for keywords or phrases in the document that will tell you what information the app or website collects, how long it keeps it and with whom it shares it. Watch out for sections that say you must “accept,” “agree” or “authorise” something, Walsh says.

“Third parties” is a key phrase, as are “advertising partners” and “affiliates”. “Retain” or “retention” can indicate how long the company keeps your personal information. “Opt out” may indicate how to turn off the sale or collection of your personal information.

“The do’s and don’ts can alter radically from one service to another, and it is essential for consumers to understand how they can use each individual service they sign up for,” Walsh says.

 

Don’t have time? 

Here’s a shortcut

 

The motto of the ToS;DR user rights initiative (short for “Terms of Service; Didn’t Read”, inspired by Internet acronym TL;DR “Too Long; Didn’t Read”): “I have read and agree to the terms” is “the biggest lie on the web”.

The project offers a free browser extension that labels and rates these agreements from very good (Class A) to very bad (Class E) on the websites you visit. When installed in your browser, it scans terms of service to unearth the worrisome stuff.

The pros and cons of going digital with a smart lock on your door

By - Feb 04,2020 - Last updated at Feb 04,2020

Photo courtesy of wordpress.com

By Dalvin Brown 

Charlotte Pfahl, 68, prefers using an old-school mechanical key to access her New York City apartment.

So when her landlord modernised the building and installed a smart lock in 2018, she and several other residents over 65 were not thrilled about it.

A few didn’t own smartphones, so they were locked out of the entrance to elevators. Those who did have a smartphone had to keep it charged, otherwise they couldn’t gain access to the lobby where mail and packages were stored, said Pfahl, a retired lawyer.

So five of them sued and won.

“We were concerned that if you lose power, the smart lock wouldn’t work. It would either lock closed or lock open,” Pfahl said. “We don’t have on-site management, so if the power goes out, as it did once, you can’t get access to your unit.”

With all of today’s technological advancements making life “easier”, it’s sometimes easy to forget that there are pros and cons to switching to any new system.

For those looking for a convenient way to monitor whether they remembered to lock up their home, smarter latches are an easy sell. They work with smartphones that most of us have, and you can programme them to identify your best friend and let them in without geting up.

Some have keypads with long security codes for when you don’t have your smartphone or short-range Bluetooth signals that can pick up when you’re nearby.

But will you really think it’s all worth it if — and when — the tech malfunctions?

 

When smart 

locks don’t work

 

In 2019, there was a massive power outage in New York City in some of the neighbourhoods surrounding Times Square. Pfahl was among the 72,000 customers who lost power.

“Frankly, most of the young tenants who only use their smartphones were standing on the streets because the [smart key] system was down and [they] didn’t carry mechanical keys to access the back stairwell,” Pfahl said.

Some challenges aren’t as dramatic as a citywide blackout but equally inconvenient or even potentially dangerous. Think about the possible scenarios born of forgetting to teach a house guest or the babysitter how to open your door, which has a daunting mechanism that looks more like a safe handle or smart speaker and nothing like an actual doorknob.

Regular door locks don’t require software updates or battery replacement. Many smart locks do. And though a particular style of door lock and handle might eventually look dated, it doesn’t face technological obsolescence.

For those who have adopted the digital pass to access most of the doors to their lives, they are at the mercy of their device. So if the phone battery dies, as they are far too well known to do, you get locked out, perhaps from everything — the door, the car, their wallet, oh and the actual phone to call for help.

Technical glitches aside, smart locks, like most other categories of tech products, come with the potential for hackers and concerns over battery life. While some go the do-it-yourself path, for others, the cost of installation can be a barrier for consumers looking to level up their home security.

 

Smart locks: Cool tech, not so cool look

 

One of the most pressing concerns for homeowners is appearance. In other words, many smart locks lack that curb appeal.

Traditional locks, which aren’t automated, tend to fade into the background since people are used to seeing them. They’ve been around for thousands of years, either placed within the doorknob itself or below it.

While there are different styles from different makers, smart locks are often chromed-out bulbs or boxes that jut out from the door. Some have modern-looking numeric dials. Others look like standard function calculators attached to the outside of the door, which some homeowners may consider an eyesore.

In fact, that’s often the determining factor for people considering launching their home locks into the digital age, according to the home tech startup Level Home.

People have been wary of “taking their lock off and putting this giant albatross on your door”, said John Martin, CEO of Level Home. “On the inside, you have this big box with four AA batteries, and on the outside, you have a [bulky] keypad. They don’t look that smart to consumers.”

Level Home introduced a $250 kit in 2019 that turns a traditional key into a smarter lock that can be controlled by a smartphone or Apple Watch for people who don’t have to sacrifice the design of their home for a new lock.

Your door still looks the same, and you can still use your mechanical key to unlock it. The hardware is installed inside the door, and the battery lasts up to a year, Martin said. Many other smart locks allow users to use their traditional key as a backup.

Like some other smart keys on the market, the seemingly invisible computerised deadbolt supports geofencing, voice activation and other smart features. The American lockset maker Kwikset also sells a discreet, smarter lock alternative that allows you to use a fob sold separately.

The idea is to “create products that don’t force people to sacrifice the expression of their home in the process of making it smart”, Martin said.

Smart locks also may have a hard time winning over older adults like pfahl who either don’t use smartphones, struggle to memorise PIN codes or who don’t have an issue using the regular keys they grew up on.

“Some of these things are harder to get used to and have a little bit of a learning curve,” said Charlie Kindel, chief product officer at SnapAV, which builds smart home products. Kindel noted that smart locks could have beneficial functions for older adults who are “ageing in place.”

“If it’s very difficult for them to get across the room and unlock the door, they can say to Alexa ‘Unlock the door.’ That can be a very freeing thing,” Kindel said.

For younger adults, outsourcing door opening may have an adverse effect, since relying on tech to auto-lock can lead to lazier habits. For example, if you’re not used to subconsciously locking your door, you may not just leave it unlocked but open unintentionally.

You also have to remember to update the firmware on some connected locks. And traditional locks aren’t open to hackers, since they don’t connect to the Internet. Though old-fashioned home break-ins are still possible.

 

Replacing deadbolt with smart lock

 

While connected home gadgets like Echo Dots and smart plugs are easy to install, putting in a complex security system on all your home entryways is often pretty complex. Hiring an expert locksmith to upgrade something that was working perfectly fine is questionable, especially if the installation costs as much as the lock.

Level Lock claims to be installable using just a screwdriver.

Despite the drawbacks, traditional locks are projected to continue to displace systems that don’t reflect a modern lifestyle at a time when people are increasingly letting strangers into their homes — either to drop off packages or sublet a spare room.

Smart locks and other home security products are among the most popular smart home gadgets for consumers, according to IDC data. 

“What we’re seeing is double-digit growth rates because people are becoming more adaptive to the idea. It’s just easier when you approach a door, and it automatically unlocks,” said Martin Heckmann, director of emerging business at LiftMaster, which provides software for smart garage doors and locks.

With a smart lock, you can give a friend temporary (and revocable) access to your home if you want. But if you give someone a key, you may never get it back. And keys are smaller and easier to lose than smartphones you can track down using other devices.

Heckmann said that while smart locks come with limitations, and many have “fail-safe” concerns, “everything is safer than having a spare key under your doormat”.

‘1917’ wins big at Baftas to take pole position for Oscars

By - Feb 03,2020 - Last updated at Feb 03,2020

British director Sam Mendes poses with the award for a director for his work on the film ‘1917’ at the BAFTA British Academy Film Awards at the Royal Albert Hall in London on Sunday (AFP photo by Adrian Dennis)

LONDON — Sweeping World War I odyssey “1917” won big at Sunday’s Bafta awards, landing the best film prize and best director trophy for Sam Mendes, and putting it in line for potential Oscars glory next weekend.

The movie, which follows two British soldiers on a perilous mission across no man’s land, had already scooped the Golden Globe for best drama, and has 10 Academy Award nominations including for best picture.

Hailed as a groundbreaking piece of cinema, it scooped seven of the nine prizes it was nominated for at Britain’s top film awards, including in cinematography, production design, sound and special visual effects.

“It’s moving for me to get this in my hometown for the first time,” said Mendes, the first British winner of the best director Bafta since Danny Boyle prevailed in 2009 for “Slumdog Millionaire”.

“Thank you to all the people who have gone to see this in the cinemas,” he told the star-studded ceremony at the Royal Albert Hall in London.

 

Disappointments

 

At this year’s Baftas, the same five movies filled the best film and best director nominations.

Joining “1917” and Mendes were “Joker” (Todd Phillips); South Korean comedy thriller “Parasite” (Bong Joon-ho); “The Irishman” (Martin Scorsese) and “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood” by Quentin Tarantino.

The evening proved particularly anti-climatic for the latter two: Tarantino’s comedy-drama won just one award — Brad Pitt, for best supporting actor — while Scorcese’s crime flick finished empty-handed.

But the evening was perhaps equally disappointing for hit film “Joker”, which led the way with 11 nominations, but ended up with just three prizes, including Joaquin Phoenix for best actor.

He beat Hollywood heavyweight Leonardo DiCaprio (“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”) as well as Adam Driver (“Marriage Story”), Taron Egerton (“Rocketman”) and Jonathan Pryce (“The Two Popes”).

 

‘Very humbling’

 

Renee Zellweger claimed the best actress award for her portrayal of Judy Garland’s late-life comeback tour in “Judy”, marking a stunning renaissance for her own wide-ranging career.

She saw off stiff competition from a talented field boasting Jessie Buckley (“Wild Rose”), Scarlett Johansson (“Marriage Story”), Saoirse Ronan (“Little Women”) and Charlize Theron (“Bombshell”).

“This is very humbling,” she told the audience of Hollywood royalty. 

“Miss Garland, London town, which you have always loved so much, still loves you back. This is for you.”

Meanwhile Laura Dern won the best supporting actress gong for Netflix’s divorce tearjerker film “Marriage Story”.

She beat out her co-star Scarlett Johansson, for her role in “Jojo Rabbit”, as well as Florence Pugh (“Little Women”) and twice-nominated Margot Robbie (“Bombshell” and “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”).

 

Diversity criticism

 

The British Academy of Film and Television Arts, in its 73rd annual movie awards, are often seen as indicative of which way the Oscars might go in Los Angeles, this year on February 9.

This year’s Baftas have faced some criticism for lacking ethnic diversity among the acting categories’ nominees, all 18 of whom were white.

Phoenix took aim at “systemic racism” and “oppression” within the industry in his acceptance speech.

“I think that we send a very clear message to people of colour that you’re not welcome here,” he added.

The British academy said it would review its voting system in time for next year’s awards.

The winners and nominees in most categories are voted for by the 6,500 members, who are industry professionals and creatives from around the world.

In previous years, senior Bafta figures said the awards could only reflect the cinema industry’s output.

“It’s infuriating. We can’t make the industry do something; all we can do is encourage,” said Bafta film committee chairman Marc Samuelson.

 

Kennedy, Serkis honoured

 

The ceremony was hosted by TV chat show presenter Graham Norton, with Prince William and his wife Kate adding some royal glamour in his 10th year as Bafta president.

The prince presented the Academy Fellowship, its highest accolade, to American producer Kathleen Kennedy, the boss of Lucasfilm, and behind some of the biggest-grossing movies ever.

They include the Star Wars sequels, “Jurassic Park”, “E. T. the Extra-Terrestrial” and the “Back to the Future” trilogy.

Meanwhile, British actor Andy Serkis received the Outstanding British Contribution to Cinema Award for his pioneering motion-capture acting for computer-generated characters.

The 55-year-old’s roles include Gollum in “The Lord of the Rings” trilogy, Caesar in the “Planet of the Apes” reboot, the titular gorilla in “King Kong” and Supreme Leader Snoke in two “Star Wars” sequels.

Ford Edge ST: Edging ahead with verve and versatility

By - Feb 03,2020 - Last updated at Feb 03,2020

Photo courtesy of Ford

First arriving as a 2019 model and now updated with new colours and equipment packages for 2020, the Ford Edge ST is the first Crossover SUV produced by the Blue Oval’s Ford Performance skunkworks wing. 

Taking on the role of Ford’s more compact performance vehicle now that the American giant is limiting its car line-up and promoting a more SUV-heavy line-up in the US and Middle East, the Edge ST effectively takes over the role that the smaller and now Europe-oriented Focus ST used to fill in these markets. 

If not quite the compact, nimble and driver- and enthusiast-oriented hot hatch that is the Focus ST, the Edge ST, however, channels enough of the former’s broad characteristics and brushstrokes for service in a Crossover SUV. 

Imbued with similar democratic accessibility and enough of the driver-engaging handling and practical daily drive road-oriented performance characteristics that make the Focus ST such a hit in Europe and the UK in particular, the larger, heavier and more powerful Edge ST channels such traits in a more relevant package for most US and Middle East drivers.

 

Verve and versatility

 

Ford Performance’s first crossover SUV, the Edge ST comes in the wake of the more luxury-oriented Lincoln MKX, with which it shares its platform and potent and efficient 2.7-litre twin-turbocharged direct injection EcoBoost V6 engine. Developing 335BHP at 5,500rpm and 380lb/ft torque at 3,250rpm with a resonant edge in Sport mode, the Edge ST’s V6 is responsive, eager, urgent, and capable of propelling the 2,052kg performance crossover from standstill to 100km/h in around 6.5-seconds. 

Mated to a slick and quick 8-speed automatic gearbox with numerous ratios to best exploit output for performance, versatility and economy, it returns estimated 11.2l/100km combined cycle fuel economy.

With four-wheel-drive providing plenty of traction and short gasflow paths ensuring very little turbo lag, quick spooling turbos and plenty of responsiveness, the Edge ST accelerates from standstill with confidence and consistency. 

A gem of an engine, the Edge ST’s twin-turbo 2.7 pulls hard and energetically from low-end, building with urgency to a muscular mid-range. Versatile and flexible in mid-range, the ST overtakes effortlessly and accumulates power and speed with verve. Responsive to throttle input, power build-up is intense and underwritten by a rich, broad, flexible and seemingly over-arching layer of torque.

 

Eager yet forgiving

 

A car-like crossover SUV riding on independent front MacPherson strut and rear integral-link rear suspension that allows a rigid lateral set-up along with supple vertical movements for improved dynamics and comfort, the Edge ST is smooth and stable at speed, yet, comfortably processes road imperfections, even when riding on optional low profile 265/40R21 tyres. 

Uncanny in how seemingly forgiving and refined it rides, the Edge ST however feels alert, tidy and eager into corners, with quick, direct and meaty steering providing more intuitive feel than expected, while body lean remains well controlled despite its 2,052kg mass.

A faster, firmer and more focused version of Ford’s family crossover, the Edge ST is a more agile handling vehicle than expected. Driving with a positive and eager disposition through corners, it seems willing and responsive, yet reassuringly grippy. 

Driving front wheels in normal circumstances, it, however, diverts power to the rear when added traction and grip are needed over loose surfaces, or when being chucked through corners, before powering out confidently. Settled, stable and reassuring at speed, the Edge ST also takes bumps and lumps in its stride and feels buttoned down on rebound.

 

Sporty and spacious

 

Dispensing with much of the garden variety family-oriented Edge crossover’s chrome highlights in favour of black, body colour and dark brushed aluminium effect accents and exterior trim, the Edge ST gains a black honeycomb mesh for its broad and hungry octagonal grille, as well as more aggressive bumpers, side skirts and dual integrated rectangular exhaust ports. 

Easily recognisable as an Edge with it high-set rear lights, slim squinting headlights, high waistline, and low descending roofline, the ST variant however has a tauter, more focused aesthetic, enhanced by its huge optional 21-inch alloy wheels.

Supportive, comfortable and well adjustable, if slightly unorthodox at first, the Edge ST’s driving position feels hunkered down with its high waistline, but features a high seat position and somewhat low steering position. Swathed with leather and Alcantara, the Edge ST has a distinctly sporty feel inside and features user-friendly controls, decent visibility and generous front and rear passenger, and cargo space. 

Well-equipped with numerous convenience features including Ford’ much improved Sync 3 infotainment system, the Edge ST also features standard rearview camera, blind spot warning with cross-traffic alert, automatic emergency braking with pedestrian detection and more.

TECHNICAL SPECIFICATIONS

 

Engine: 2.7-litre, in-line, twin-turbocharged V6-cylinders

Bore x stroke: 83 x 83mm

Compression ratio: 10:1

Valve-train: 24-valve, DOHC, direct injection

Redline: 6,500rpm

Gearbox: 8-speed automatic, four-wheel-drive

Ratios: 1st 4.48; 2nd 3.15; 3rd 2.87; 4th 1.84; 5th 1.41; 6th 1.0; 7th 0.74; 8th 0.62; R 2.88

Power, BHP (PS) [kW]: 335 (340) [250] @5,500rpm

Specific power: 124.3BHP/litre

Power-to-weight: 163BHP/tonne

Torque, lb/ft (Nm): 380 (515) @3,250rpm

Specific torque: 191.1Nm/litre

Torque-to-weight: 251Nm/tonne

0-100km/h: approximately 6.5-seconds (est.)

Fuel consumption, combined: 11.2-litres/100km*

Length: 4,795mm

Width: 1,928mm

Height: 1,735mm

Wheelbase: 2,850mm

Track, F/R: 1,646/1,643mm 

Ground clearance: 208mm

Approach/break-over/departure angles: 19.4°/16.7°/21°

Headroom, F/R: 1,021/1,023mm

Legroom, F/R: 1,082/1,031mm

Shoulder room, F/R: 1,531/1,536mm

Hip room, F/R: 1,420/1,460mm

Liftover height: 752mm

Luggage volume, behind 2nd/1st row, liquid, to roof: 1,111-/2,078-litres

Fuel capacity: 70-litres

Kerb weight: 2,052kg

Steering: Electric-assisted rack and pinion

Turning circle: 12-metres (est.)

Suspension, F/R: MacPherson strut/integral-link, anti-roll bars

Brakes, F/R: Ventilated discs, 345 x 32mm/345 x 19mm

Tyres: 265/40R21 (optional)

*(US EPA Estimate)

Taking your relationship for granted?

By , - Feb 02,2020 - Last updated at Feb 02,2020

Photo courtesy of Family Flavours magazine

Couples often come into my office complaining about the lack of intimacy after many years of marriage. They talk about how their partner has changed from someone attentive and caring towards their feelings and needs to someone who behaves indifferently and selfishly at times.

These couples tell me how at the beginning of their relationship their partner was very courteous and polite to them, saying “please” and “thank you” often, dressing up and grooming for their dates, listening and having great conversations with them and going out of their way to please them. And nowadays they spend most of their time on their phone or computer, groom themselves only when they go out of the house, rarely ask for their partner’s opinion or input before making a decision, have nothing nice to say to their partner and instead criticise them when things do not go according to their expectations.

Couples look back at those early days and feel sad and disappointed. They don’t feel close to their partner anymore and they don’t feel loved and taken care of like they did at the beginning of their relationship; in other words, they feel like the person they are with today is not the person they married, and begin to wonder whether they have made a mistake marrying that person or that they’ve simply fallen out of love.

 

What goes wrong

 

At the beginning of any relationship, love is fresh. We are excited to spend every moment with each other, we want to know everything about each other and we tend to treat each other with love and care; in other words, we want to impress one another.

With time, feelings of infatuation naturally and gradually tapper off and are replaced with maturer long-term love. Our efforts to court and impress tapper off as well; this is natural and acceptable if changes are small. Problems in relationships arise when one or both partners stop showing the other that they care for them and that they love them. They are no longer courteous and caring towards their partner-they feel they are living with a buddy or a roommate. Becoming comfortable with your partner is one thing and taking them for granted is something else.

 

Tips for maintaining intimacy and a positive connection

 

Expressing appreciation for the small things:  Not regarding whatever your partner is doing for you or the family as their duty in this marriage Recognising that we all thrive on appreciation and it motivates us to keep giving.

Treating your partner with courtesy often: Saying “good morning” and “goodbye”; asking if you can help them with a task; opening the door for them asking them how they are feeling or if they need anything.

Listening to your partner and respecting points of view: Hear what your partner is saying; not automatically shrugging off their concerns or becoming angry and defensive; understanding that your partner’s viewpoint does not automatically mean that you agree with them; it simply means that you respect them enough to hear what they have to say — this is a courtesy you would extend even to a total stranger.

Having deeper and more substantial conversations: Not falling into the pattern of only talking about the mundane things in your relationship, such as work and the children; getting into the habit of setting alone time together and bringing up deeper and more substantial topics, such as your goals or dreams for the future or an old incident that you would like to share.

Being careful with your body language:

• Maintaining eye contact when your partner is talking to you, which conveys respect and care

• Refraining from rolling your eyes and using a sarcastic tone

 

Not criticising or disrespecting your partner publically: 

• Not addressing marital problems in front of others as it is disrespectful and will only induce shame and resentment in your partner instead of remorse

• Addressing your concerns privately and assertively

 

Cultivating a culture of fondness and admiration in your relationship: Instead of constantly looking out for what your partner is doing wrong in the relationship and then sharing that with them through criticism and blame, you can train your mind to look for what your partner is doing right, share it with them and compliment them. Then it is okay to complain about something and ask your partner for what you need instead. In a healthy relationship, positive interaction has to outweigh any negative interaction by a ratio of 5:1; you need 5 positive interactions to neutralise one negative interaction.

Setting weekly or bi-weekly dates: Preferably setting one day in the week to do something together as a couple; it could be going out for an intimate dinner, watching a movie or spending intimate time together at home on your own. Setting weekly or bi-weekly date nights and sticking to them conveys to your partner that you respect and care for them and that they and the relationship are a priority.

Reprinted with permission from Family Flavours magazine

 

By Mariam Hakim

 

Relationships and Couples Therapist

The best way to avoid the scary coronavirus? Wash your hands

By - Feb 01,2020 - Last updated at Feb 01,2020

Photo courtesy of thehealthy.com

Americans are watching with alarm as a new coronavirus spreads in China and cases pop up in the United States. They are barraged with information about what kinds of masks are best to prevent viral spread. Students are handing out masks in Seattle. Masks have run out in Brazos County, Texas.

Hang on.

I’ve worked as an emergency room physician. And as a New York Times correspondent in China, I covered the SARS outbreak in 2002 and 2003, during which a novel coronavirus first detected in Guangdong sickened more than 8,000 people and killed more than 800. My two children attended elementary school in Beijing throughout the outbreak.

Here are my main takeaways from that experience for ordinary people on the ground:

Wash your hands frequently.

Don’t go to the office when you are sick.

Don’t send your kids to school or day care when they are ill, either.

Notice I didn’t say anything about masks. Having a mask with you as a precaution makes sense if you are in the midst of an outbreak, as I was when out reporting in the field during those months. But wearing it constantly is another matter. I donned a mask when visiting hospitals where SARS patients had been housed. I wore it in the markets where wild animals that were the suspected source of the outbreak were being butchered, blood droplets flying. I wore it in crowded enclosed spaces that I couldn’t avoid, like airplanes and trains, as I travelled to cities involved in the outbreak, like Guangzhou and Hong Kong. You never know if the guy coughing and sneezing two rows ahead of you is ill or just has an allergy.

But outdoors, infections don’t spread well through the air. Those photos of people walking down streets in China wearing masks are dramatic but the subjects appear uninformed. And remember if a mask has, perchance, intercepted viruses that would have otherwise ended up in your body, then the mask is contaminated. So, in theory, to be protected maybe you should use a new one for each outing.

The simple masks are better than nothing but not all that effective because they don’t seal well. For anyone tempted to go out and buy the gold standard, N95 respirators, note that they are uncomfortable. Breathing is more work. It’s hard to talk to people. On one long flight at the height of the outbreak, on which my few fellow passengers were mostly epidemiologists trying to solve the SARS puzzle, many of us (including me) wore our masks for the first couple of hours on the flight. Then the food and beverage carts came.

Though viruses spread through droplets in the air, a bigger worry to me was always transmission via what doctors call “fomites”, infected items. A virus gets on a surface — a shoe or a doorknob or a tissue, for example. You touch the surface and then next touch your face or rub your nose. It’s a great way to acquire illness. So after walking in the animal markets, I removed my shoes carefully and did not take them into the hotel room. And, of course, I washed my hands immediately.

Remember, by all indications SARS, which killed about 10 per cent of those infected, was a deadlier virus than the new coronavirus circulating now. So keep things in perspective.

Faced with SARS, many foreigners chose to leave Beijing or at least to send their children back to the United States. Our family stayed, kids included. We wanted them with us and didn’t want them to miss school, especially during what would be their final year in China. But equally important in making the decision was that the risk of getting SARS on an airplane or in the airport seemed greater than being smart and careful while staying put in Beijing.

And we were: I stopped taking my kids to indoor playgrounds or crowded malls or delicious but densely packed neighbourhood Beijing restaurants. Out of an abundance of caution, we cancelled a family vacation to Cambodia — though my fear was less about catching SARS on the flight than that one of the kids would have a fever from an ear infection upon our return at a border screening, and would be stuck in a prolonged quarantine in China. We instead took a vacation within China, where we carried masks with us but didn’t use them except on a short domestic flight.

In time, during the SARS outbreak, the government shut down theaters and schools in Beijing, as it is doing now in many Chinese cities because these viruses are more easily transmitted in such crowded places.

But there was also a lot of irrational behaviour: Entering a village on the way to a hike near the Great Wall, our car was stopped by locals who had set up a roadblock to check the temperature of all passengers. They used an oral thermometer that was only minimally cleaned after each use. What a great way to spread a virus.

The International School of Beijing, where my children were students, was one of the few in the capital — perhaps the only one — that stayed open throughout the SARS outbreak, though the classes were emptier, since so many kids had departed to their home countries. It was a studied, but brave move because a parent at the school had gotten SARS at the very beginning of the outbreak on a flight back from Hong Kong. She recovered fine, but it was close to home and families were scared.

The school instituted a bunch of simple precautionary policies: a stern note to parents reminding them not to send a child to school who was sick and warning them that students would be screened for fevers with ear thermometers at the school door. There was no sharing of food at lunch. The teacher led the kids in frequent hand washing throughout the day at classroom sinks, while singing a prolonged “hand washing song” to ensure they did more than a cursory pass under the faucet with water only.

If a family left Beijing and came back, the child would have to stay at home for an extended period before returning to class to make sure they hadn’t caught SARS elsewhere.

With those precautions in place, I observed something of a public health miracle: Not only did no child get SARS, but it seemed no student was sick with anything at all for months on end. No stomach bugs. No common colds. Attendance was more or less perfect.

The World Health Organisation declared the SARS outbreak contained in July 2003. But, oh, that those habits persisted. The best first-line defences against SARS or the new coronavirus or most any virus at all are the ones that grandma and common sense taught us, after all.

By Elisabeth Rosenthal

 

 

Brad Pitt has already won awards season

By - Jan 30,2020 - Last updated at Jan 30,2020

Brad Pitt (AFP photo)

Brad Pitt is having a moment. Well, several moments, really.

He’s raking in awards for his role as stunt double Cliff Booth in Quentin Tarantino’s “One Upon a Time in Hollywood”, and with that comes opportunities in front of a captive audience.

And, oh, has Pitt delivered.

He got us laughing with a decades-old “Titanic” joke and sent all of America frantically searching for his Tinder profile. The comedic genius of those speeches comes “from the heart”, Pitt says.

“These people mean a lot to me. I want to say something meaningful … And I have some funny friends,” he told USA Today on the red carpet at the Santa Barbara International Film Festival.

Pitt, 56, noted on the Screen Actors Guild Awards that he’s “been banging away at this thing for 30 years”. He did, after all, play a sexy young thief in 1991’s “Thelma & Louise”.

But his 50s are really bringing out the sass – and he admits it.

“I’m old. It’s amazing how much more relaxed you get the older you get, right?” he told USA TODAY on the SAG red carpet when asked about his carefree vibe.

It’s very likely that Pitt wins best supporting actor at the Oscars, so we can’t wait for another one of his nonchalant, entertaining acceptance speeches.

Here’s a look back at his headline-grabbing moments this awards season (so far).

Pitt to Leonardo DiCaprio: ‘Still, I would’ve shared the raft’

His succinct and hilarious aside had one fan calling Pitt an “absolute legend” while another said it “just made my life”. When he accepted his best supporting actor award for “Once Upon a Time” at the Golden Globes, he wanted to recognise his co-star DiCaprio.

“He’s an all-star, he’s a gent. … Still, I would’ve shared the raft,” he joked. Yep, that’s a reference to DiCaprio’s 1997 film “Titanic” because there was absolutely room on that floating door for Jack (DiCaprio) and Rose.

Wait. Leo calls Brad lover?

Speaking of DiCaprio, the two appear to have a budding bromance. At the Globes, we learned that Pitt lovingly calls DiCaprio “LDC”. But LDC’s nickname for Pitt is even more adorable.

“ ‘Lover’. He calls me ‘Lover’, “ Pitt joked to People TV on the SAG Awards red carpet. “It’s a bit confusing, but I roll with it.”

We would definitely swipe right on that Tinder profile

As far as we know, Pitt is single, but we highly doubt he is searching for love online. Still, that didn’t stop him from joking about it.

“I’m going to add this to my Tinder profile,” he riffed while accepting his SAG Award.

Plenty more Brad-isms came from that night, too. Apparently, he had come down with the flu and was “very contagious”.

“Make sure you guys Purell up,” he joked to USA Today. “Why do you think I’m wearing this coat, man? I’m just trying to stay warm.”

His award-winning role wasn’t a stretch

Swiping right? Hold the phone. Pitt also poked fun at himself — and perhaps his failed marriages to Jennifer Aniston and Angelina Jolie — in his SAG speech.

“Let’s be honest, it was a difficult part,” Pitt joked about “Once Upon a Time.” “A guy who gets high, takes his shirt off and doesn’t get on with his wife. It was a big stretch. Big.”

The cameras panned to Aniston, who grinned and clapped. She won an award shortly after and Pitt stopped what he was doing to watch her speech backstage.

The pair caused a frenzy when they were pictured together celebrating their wins.

 

‘I took the red pill’

 

Pitt received the Leonard Maltin Modern Master Award at the Santa Barbara Film Festival and dropped a hilarious bomb when he hesitantly acknowledged that he turned down a role in “The Matrix”. THE. MATRIX.

“I took the red pill,” he said with a smile and without missing a beat.

In the film, Neo (the role ultimately went to Keanu Reeves), is offered a red pill or a blue pill. He chooses the red pill, which shows him “the truth”, although it may be unpleasant. The blue pill represents the choice to remain in ignorance.

“If we were doing a show on the great movies I’ve passed on, we would need two nights,” Pitt joked.

Bradley Cooper is a “sweetheart” who helped Pitt get sober

It hasn’t been all jokes for Pitt, though. His frankness also came out when he accepted best supporting actor at the National Board of Review awards gala. He dedicated part of his speech to Cooper.

“Bradley just put his daughter to bed and then rushed over to do this. He’s a sweetheart.” Pitt said. “I got sober because of this guy, and every day’s been happier ever since. I love you, and I thank you.”

Pitt has been open about his struggle with sobriety before. In an interview with The New York Times last year, Pitt revealed he spent more than a year in Alcoholics Anonymous after splitting with Jolie.

By Amy Haneline

 

 

Artificial Intelligence meets social networking, video and music

By - Jan 30,2020 - Last updated at Jan 30,2020

Artificial Intelligence (AI), beyond any doubt, is one of the most exciting aspects of digital technology. It is also one of the most promising, one that is starting to change our attitude towards technology and the way we deal with it. AI is not about faster and ever more powerful computers and networks, but about interfacing with them in a different, a more, well, intelligent manner, though of course AI also needs ultra-fast processors to work and to deliver.

From its early days in the mid-1980s, when Elaine Rich from the University of Texas in Austin wrote a pioneering student handbook on the subject, to today’s phenomenal video-sharing social networking service TikTok, AI has come a long way.

At first sight AI forays seem the most spectacular in critical, business applications like for instance driverless vehicles and online financial transactions. Last year, Yessi Bello Perez, writing for thenextweb.com, said “Blockchain and AI could be a perfect match”, confirming that online payment and banking are to benefit from AI in a significant manner very soon.

Apart from the above very “serious and professional” fields, AI seems already to have touched the masses in a very popular, more entertaining manner: social networking and music. Suffice to see the extraordinary popularity of TikTok. The social network service uses AI to let you easily and quickly create personalised videos where the music, the beat, the lip sync and even the dance and body movements are perfectly synchronised, with almost no manual intervention at all.

The result is very pleasing and looks as if it were edited by professional movie directors and makers. With traditional video editing this would take forever and would not even produce the same result in the end.

TikTok was launched in September 2016 and already has 500 million users. Admitted, the China-based network is mainly used by the under-twenty population, but this does diminish its impact on society, overall – quite the opposite actually! It certainly is a great illustration of one practical, tangible application of AI.

In the line of AI applied to video creation, but in a segment that is more specific to pure music, the technology is bound to revolutionise the way music is taught, composed and played, though some purists remain sceptical about the actual results, standing by their strong belief that music is an art that does not obey technology.

Still, Chinese giant Huawei (yes China, again...), claims to have used smartphones and “deep neural networking” to analyse the available movements of Franz Schubert’s famous unfinished Symphony No. 8 and to have then helped compose the two missing ones!

Metronaut is another IT application, made by French company Antescofo, and that is available for Apple devices and operating system. It provides intelligent musical accompaniment for a solo instrument and seems for the moment restricted to classical music. Antescofo is the brainchild and product of IRCAM, the “French institute for science about music and sound and avant-garde electro-acoustical art music.”

Joué (French for toy, spelled in a fancy way) is a music keyboard that looks that no other keyboard. It has a small footprint, being hardly larger than a full-size computer keyboard, and thanks to AI technology it lets you play, compose and arrange music in an unprecedented way. Joué is hard to describe in words but can be easily seen in spectacular action on the web.

Will AI impact other popular fields soon, other social networks such as Facebook or Instagram? It would be interesting to see how.

Answers to your most common questions about the Wuhan coronavirus

By - Jan 29,2020 - Last updated at Jan 29,2020

Photo courtesy of wordpress.com

SEATTLE — As a new type of coronavirus rages through China and spreads to other countries the public understandably has a lot of questions about the illness and how to avoid it.

As of late Monday afternoon, more than 2,700 people had been infected and 81 had died, with the vast majority of cases in China. Five people in the United States have been confirmed to have the coronavirus, including a Snohomish County man who fell ill after returning from a trip to Wuhan almost two weeks ago — before China or the United States had implemented travel restrictions to stem the outbreak.

We’ve been asking you, our readers, what you want to know about the novel coronavirus, which is also being called the Wuhan coronavirus, and we’re taking your questions to health care professionals. Below are answers to some common questions that have come in recently: What is a coronavirus, and how does it spread?

Coronaviruses have the ability to mutate and jump from animal to human. The novel coronavirus is believed to have done that at an animal market in Wuhan, a city of 11 million people in central China.

It is now believed to be spreading from person to person, although it’s unclear how easily. So far, that hasn’t happened within the United States, according to public health officials. The risk is much greater in and around Wuhan, where the virus originated.

You may remember outbreaks of SARS and MERS in recent years. Those were also coronaviruses that spread from person to person, generally between close contacts.

“When person-to-person spread has occurred with MERS and SARS, it is thought to have happened mainly via respiratory droplets produced when an infected person coughs or sneezes, similar to how influenza and other respiratory pathogens spread,” according to the federal Centres for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC).

Coronaviruses regularly circulate throughout the region and around the world, and this one probably acts similarly to those, said Dr Robert L. Thompson, chair of Kaiser Permanente Washington’s prevention and control programme.

The new coronavirus has so far mostly affected people older than 60 and those with underlying health issues.

How is the patient in Snohomish County doing? What about people who have come into contact with him?

The patient, a man in his 30s, was in satisfactory condition as of Monday. He’s been in an isolation unit at Providence Regional Hospital in Everett since early last week.

The man had been traveling solo in Wuhan since November. He flew into Seattle-Tacoma International Airport on January 15 and began noticing symptoms a few days later, at which point he contacted his doctor and was hospitalised. When he tested positive for the novel coronavirus, he became the United States’ first confirmed case.

The state Department of Health says the man had “close contact” with 64 people since returning to Washington. All of them are being monitored for symptoms such as a fever and cough.

What about the three University of Washington students who were screened for the novel coronavirus after a trip to Wuhan? Which dorm were they in?

One student, who lives off campus, tested negative.

The other two are in isolation while they await results. Those two live on campus, but UW isn’t saying where. The university has notified their roommates, who are now being monitored by Public Health — Seattle & King County.

Should I avoid Sea-Tac airport and UW’s Seattle campus?

No need to avoid those places, even if your immune system is compromised, and you shouldn’t worry even if you were at Sea-Tac on the same day as the Snohomish County patient, said Jeff Duchin of Public Health — Seattle & King County. The virus isn’t circulating there or anywhere else in the region, he said.

How can I avoid catching the Wuhan coronavirus? Should I wear a mask?

Do what you would do to avoid catching the flu: Wash your hands regularly with soap and water for at least 20 seconds, cover your mouth and nose when coughing and stay home from work or school if you have a fever and cough, Thompson said.

While masks should be worn if you’re having a respiratory issue, especially if you’re at a clinic or hospital, there’s no need to wear one while going about daily life if you’re not sick, Duchin said.

Is it safe to travel to China or other parts of Asia?

The CDC advises people to avoid all nonessential travel to China. For other countries, check the CDC’s latest travel advisories and warnings at cdc.gov/travel/destinations/list.

Can packages containing items made in China carry the Wuhan coronavirus?

In the age of Amazon, a lot of packages are being dropped on doorsteps containing products made in China. But the risk of the coronavirus hitching a ride on those products is very low, according to the CDC, because coronaviruses don’t survive for long on surfaces, especially when being shipped for a period of days or weeks in ambient temperatures.

By Ryan Blethen

Google aims AI at whales, words and well-being

By - Jan 29,2020 - Last updated at Jan 29,2020

SAN FRANCISCO — Google on Tuesday provided a look at efforts to put artificial intelligence to use for good, from protecting whales to breaking language barriers.

The Internet giant unveiled projects on AI work teams a week after Google chief executive Sundar Pichai urged a “proportional approach” to regulating the technology.

Among demonstrations on Tuesday was a “bioacoustics” project using AI to help scientists, governments and nonprofit groups track endangered species.

Two years ago, Google partnered with the US National Oceanic and Atmospheric Adminstration to track humpback whales by using AI recognise the sound of whales in audio captured by underwater microphones. 

Google on Tuesday announced an alliance with environmental groups to track critically endangered killer whales in the Salish Sea using AI.

“We trained a deep neural network that automatically and immediately detects orcas and sends alerts to Canadian harbour managers,” Google said.

Another AI team showed how Google translation software that already lets smartphones serve as interpreters is being enhanced to power a new feature to transcribe what is being said in real time and provide the results in text.

“With this, your Android mobile phone will effectively turn into an almost real time translator device for long-form speech,” Google said.

Google’s AI endeavours include infusing cords, headphone cables, clothing drawstrings or other textiles with gesture-sensing capabilities that could allow electronic devices to be controlled with squeezes or twists.

Google engineers are also exploring using AI to help with medical diagnostics, such as detecting signs of cancer or eye disease in scans.

Pichai, also boss of Google’s parent company Alphabet, argued before an audience at a Brussels think tank, Bruegel, that companies like his own — an Internet behemoth valued at $1 trillion — need to be given a say as governments formulate AI regulatory policy.

AI is seen as an area where developments and applications risk outpacing regulatory measures unless authorities act swiftly. 

“There is no question in my mind that artificial intelligence needs to be regulated,” Pichai said, while stressing that Google wants “to offer our expertise, experience, and tools as we grapple with the inevitable tensions and trade-offs”.

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